I know it’s an oxymoron: Nobody wants a divorce, so how can one be any good? But when you face a divorce, you have plenty of chances to make it less bad (if not really good, at least in the long run, in hindsight).
I have been a divorce attorney for 24 years, and an expert in what is best for both parties when divorced. As a divorcee, I personally mastered “what works” that helps people weather the often rough waters of divorce.
When you are faced with a divorce or other family law issue (custody, support, home partnership, cohabitation), you have the maximum chance of success in resolving everything to achieve the best benefits through mediation.
This may sound somewhat self-interested, since I work as a family law broker full time…but I became a broker after giving up a very high paying divorce attorney job because I felt it was important to be part of the solution, not an encouragement to the fight that often characterizes divorce. I traded in my luxury car for a 2002 Honda Accord, and 11 years later still helping families through this difficult life transition through divorce.
You can solve a lot of problems you will encounter with our free tools:
Here’s how it works:
In mediation, you and your spouse or partner work with a neutral and impartial professional or team of mediators. It is often a lawyer, a therapist trained in mediation, or someone with legal and counseling experience. The mediator’s job in a family law case is to help you settle your differences, from cars and furniture to parenting plans for children, financial support, and sharing retirement accounts.
When considering a family law or divorce mediator, look around. Broker styles vary, ask a potential broker if a free orientation or initial consultation is available. Take the time to determine what type of broker might work best for your personal circumstances. This is a very personal process, so you should look for a personal connection with your chosen broker.
A mediator’s style may include:
* Gives suggestions
* Inform you about the legal provisions
* Connect what others have done in your case
* Define your options
* Help you think of alternative ways to solve your problem
* Facilitate communication
* Ensure that the divorce discussion is balanced, productive and respectful
Write down agreements in a persuasive and easy-to-follow manner
* Guide you through court papers (or do it for you)
* Guiding you to stay on task and end discussions, because when discussions get tough, it’s tempting to just change the topic.
Not all mediators do all of these things, so use this list as your list of questions when considering a mediator in divorce proceedings